Not content with foamy projectiles of mass annoyance, Nerf has branched out into swords. It isn’t a good idea.
I came across them when Julia and I went to Target last night, ostensibly to get some last minute item for my dad’s birthday party, but also to let Julia blow off some steam on her favorite activity: lining up the plastic Schleich animals by family grouping.
She takes them down, decides on gender/familial status — if not readily apparent, the animals tend to be highly-detailed, but you never know with the whales or reptiles — and lines them all up in whatever pattern makes sense. Then we’ll admire her handiwork for a bit before putting them away.
While she was doing that, I was looking over the new array of Nerf weaponry at the end of the aisle. I was, of course, in meerkat mode, constantly looking for predators or, more accurately, people who might toss me a tsk for not hovering over my daughter for fear someone would grab her and run.
Still, I was getting tired of admiring the growing parade and, yes, acknowledging the obvious evidence that this or that horse, in particular, was a boy.
The Nerf collection nowadays is impressive. I couldn’t tell you if they still make soft balls (as opposed to the hard plastic ones on the ponies) any more, because all that was in front of me was the military hardware. There are dart gun tag games, sniper rifles and the new 3-rounds-per-second chain gun. And ammo, lots of ammo for kids too lazy to check under the couch.
They have sniper rifles that can reach 30 feet (which is impressive for foam), but the Nerf people apparently feel that the ought to branch out into hand-to-hand combat. The Nerf swords are impressive and pretty much what you’d think: foam with a stiff plastic core. They’re also a little painful.
I whacked myself a few times in the forearm and it didn’t tickle or blossom into flowers. It stung a bit.
I’m not against pain. In fact, I’m all for it in small degrees. Play pain is an important part of childhood, and I’m sure the Nerf swords more satisfactory to kids than the entirely-foam swords in the dress up aisle. They want to inflict pain, if just a little. And, frankly, the lightsabers are a little lacking in the danger-area.
The Nerf swords are a win for kids and their bruising, but I’d be surprised if they last.